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05 September 2002 @ 08:45 pm

Edited: Thanks for all the responses...I just felt so horrid when I got home I didn't want to explain further. Basically it's the whole weight thing again. Whenever I see a new doctor they act like I need saving. They forced me to be weighed - although I refused to look at the scale and told them NOT to tell me, it was still traumatic, and then the doctor was all... "When did you gain weight?" I replied, "When I was 5." Dumbass. Then he started on about weight loss surgery (it is EVIL and I will not do it!!) and diets, which are what got me to weighing so much in the first place. I hate that doctors are supposed to know about this stuff when they are actually clueless. So I finally said that unless he knew of some new breakthroughs in metabolism I hadn't heard of, there was nothing he would be able to do for me in that regard. I just HATE having to defend myself every time. I DETEST being made to feel like I am something horrible because I will not go along with their body mutilations or dangerous medications or starvation plans. Yes, I would like to weigh less than I do - but I will NOT do anything to further compromise my health or anything that will eventually rebound and make me gain it all back and more, once again.
The only good thing was that I was able to get a free month of my diabetes medication, so now I only don't have my antidepressant. But he didn't do anything for my toe - and didn't appear to know what was wrong with it - and did nothing for my knee. So, blah.
I feel: crushedcrushed
I want to be a genetic dead end.: Stitchshakespearechic on September 5th, 2002 03:57 pm (UTC)
Oh no! What did they do to you? Bastards!
hautemonde on September 5th, 2002 04:03 pm (UTC)
closedandrush on September 5th, 2002 04:12 pm (UTC)
What happened love?? :(
irisiolani on September 5th, 2002 05:07 pm (UTC)
Awwww! *hugs* What happened???????
(Deleted comment)
snapessecret on September 5th, 2002 06:32 pm (UTC)
Forget the anal probes - just show them your icon! Yikes!
snapessecret on September 5th, 2002 06:30 pm (UTC)
What did they do to you? *hugs*
instructor of the immobile artsingridmatthews on September 5th, 2002 06:50 pm (UTC)
After my thyroid was taken out, I gained a lot of weight and got the spiel every time from the doctors about the blahfatblahdietblah, even though my chart with the NO THYROID was right there. If you're diabetic and on anti-depressants, they should know that you don't process food (especially fat-encouragin sugars and carbs) correctly. Even *I* know that.

Next time get on the scale backwards and say: "Listen, fuckwad. I pay you to treat what I ask you to treat, nothing more and nothing less. Shut up about the weight and let's get to what I need from you. You're no different than my hairdresser, and frankly, I'd take more guff from her than you."

Once you start looking past the white coat and get into the idea that a doctor is just another service industry joe, there for you to command, life in the doctor's office gets a lot better.
Vicki: who am i?hermorrine on September 6th, 2002 04:03 pm (UTC)
In truth, I am normally the one telling other people what you just told me. I mean, I totally stood my ground when he kept asking if I wasn't doing anything to lose weight and didn't intend to. It was obvious that he could NOT understand why I wasn't attempting some sort of weight loss. And he wasn't thin himself - I LOVE those.

I used to work for doctors - 4 years in medical school - so they are not superheros to me. Plus, Mom's a nurse and bro-in-law is a doctor, so, yeah. They get the same amount of respect as everyone else does - til they blow it.

I was more bitching because I HATE having to go through this shit EVERY time I go to a new doctor. And in this situation - an almost free county clinic - what the hell is the guy going to do for me? If I had said, oh yeah, please cut me up, who did he think would PAY for that? What a moron.

But thanks for your support. The more I get to know you, the more I like you. *grin*
lore: StitchDisgruntledlore on September 6th, 2002 12:34 am (UTC)
I'm definitely with lexluvsclark. I absolutely will not get on the scale, which is my right not to do. I tell the nurse I will not and sometimes she will stop at the (very public) scale and stare at me anyway. I smile and stare right back and eventually she moves on. I also have stopped putting out my arm for the smaller bloodpressure cuff. Sometimes I will mention it before that part of the exam, sometimes I will let the moment come and look at the nurse with innocent confusion. Most nurses are smart enough to go find the cuff before I have to say anything now.

Screw that damn surgery, people have died from messing with their bodies so dramatically. A man at work had it done, all paid for by state disability dollars because he has a documented learning disability (grr). He got a local gym to give him a free membership for allowing them to take Before and After photos of him for their advertising (and I'm sure the ads won't mention the surgery). He lost weight for about 6 months and has spent the last year putting most of it back on. Besides, isn't the surgery all about controlling food intake? Couldn't they just pass me the food regimen and let me *pretend* I had the surgery?

ANYWAY, hang in there. When you have a job with medical insurance you'll be able to see a wider range of doctors so you can find one that makes you feel comfortable. I really do know how you feel right now, so at least you're not alone. *big hugs*

love, lore
Vicki: who am i?hermorrine on September 6th, 2002 04:11 pm (UTC)
*nods* See what I said to lexluvsclark as well. It seems you and I have a lot in common. I insist on the larger cuff - or tell them they can try on my lower arm, but it won't be as accurate. And normally I would refuse completely to be weighed - but the nurse said that because of the grants and such they get for diabetic patients, they really DID need my weight. Considering the place is the almost-free clinic, I kinda felt I had to. Believe me, I haven't been on a scale since... 95? Maybe?

I don't know if you were on my friends' list back when I posted more about WLS on my old LJ or not, but my cousin and one of my best friends both had the surgery. Yes, they've both lost something like 200 lbs and so far - about 2 years for both - have kept it off, but they are still what most people would consider fat, and they both have all sorts of nasty side effects to deal with. And THEY are people who are considered success stories! Believe me, I know of people who were much worse off afterwards, not to mention the people who died. Since I was the leader of a size acceptance org for a number of years, I heard many stories. And I'm not going there. Yes, being this fat may kill me. But I'd rather die like this than from mutilations or a mostly untried surgery. Oh, and I know that I occasionally eat more than other people, but my food intake is really NOT my problem. As I said to the imbecile doctor, it's all about the metabolism, and no one can do anything about that.

Thanks for your comment. I'm glad to know that there are other people who get it. *hugs*
That's what she said.: Hmmph.altricial on September 6th, 2002 01:24 am (UTC)
I am refusing to see the doctor, too. My mum wants me to go for full body checkup and I know they'll harp about my weight and shit and ugggggghhh SCREW THEM ALL, MAN. >:0
Vicki: i am righthermorrine on September 6th, 2002 04:14 pm (UTC)
*hugs* You should go, maybe when you go back to London, because you should have a full workup at least yearly. However, you do NOT have to put up with weight loss bullshit if you go. See all the comments on this thread on my LJ for pointers, or ask me online. I know going to the doctor sucks, but YOU are the one with the power, not them. As I said to others, I put my foot down on his bullshit - I was just lamenting the fact that I HAD to. I just get sick of defending my position every damned time.
Toby Malfoy: elijah eyetobymalfoy on September 6th, 2002 08:25 am (UTC)
Stupid Doc